| hmm |
[May. 24th, 2006|04:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bored | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | i'm 9 today | ] |
Why do I even have this thing anymore?
I'll never care enough to update it. So much happens that this LJ will never tell about.
What's the point? oh well. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 19th, 2006|06:36 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | Gucci Man | ] |
Yeah. My birthday was on the 12th.
I'm glad to see some people actually care and said happy birthday and such, and I had fun with the people I saw that day.
Life has been hectic but not at the same time. I know that doesn't make sense, but it makes sense to me, and I suppose that's all that matters. Everything has changed so much. Now that I'm 18, I really need to start making something out of my life. I'll be going around apply for jobs again soon, and hopefully I'll get some results this time.
Yeah. I know I'm the shit, my chain hang down to my dick.
Fuckin ICY, bitch. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 9th, 2006|06:04 pm] |
what the fuck just happened |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 10th, 2006|05:00 pm] |
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I'll drown in the rainfall, and float 'til I find you. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 7th, 2006|04:35 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
I miss her so much. Why did she have to go away? I'm trying my best to move on, but I don't want to move on. I just want her.
always denied what I want the most. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 7th, 2006|03:14 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  gone | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | death cab | ] |
As I sat in my chair, my eyes slowly explored the confines of my tiny room while my ears were carressed and my body soothed by the relaxing music coming from my computer speakers.
For some reason, everything was extremely dull and lifeless. Almost black and white, but not quite. Had the music altered the way I percieve things around me, or was it something else? |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 1st, 2006|09:42 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | worried | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | radiohead | ] |
Why are people falling victim to drama? What the hell is going on, exactly? Everything is becoming so fucked up recently, and I don't see how it all even started. All the sudden, drama pokes its ugly ass head into our business, and people start getting all upset over stupid things.
Honestly, what the hell, guys? Drama is so below all of us.
Edit: Also, on a side note, I don't think I've done anything fucked up towards anybody recently, have I? If so, please say something, as it's highly likely that such actions were unintentional, and I'd love to get it cleared up as fast as possible.
I'd also like to note, that you shouldn't take everything people say at face value. Things tend to snowball when they pass from person to person. |
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| down the drain |
[Feb. 26th, 2006|01:43 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | numb | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | Postal Service - This Place is a Prison | ] |
i lost her and i dont see any point if giving a fuck about life anymore. if you dont like me, go fuck yourself. i dont care what you think about me, so shove your shit talking right up your ass you piece of dog shit. that goes for all of you who have "lost all respect for me". yeah. care to elaborate on why that has happened? or maybe none of you have ever had respect for me in the first place. i try my best to be a good fiend. i guess its not good enough. why should i care anymore. i really dont. you're either my friend or my enemy. i suppose a lot of people have already chose their side, and for that, im sorry. sorry it couldn't be any other way.
i've just given up all hope on life.
and this bit here goes out to sky: i love you, dude. dont ever doubt it for a second. life has been hectic lately, so dont take anything i do personally. i will always be there for you. |
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| Farewell. |
[Jan. 31st, 2006|03:28 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crushed | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | Trust Company - Downfall | ] |
So, she's gone. They sent her off to boarding school, and refuse to give out any details about it. They think they're helping her, which is the ironic part. I don't see how you can help somebody (who, might I add, is perfectly fine to begin with) by sending them off to another state, away from all their friends/people they know, and refuse to tell anybody where it's at.
With that, she is gone. I don't know when/if she is ever coming back. As far as I should be concerned, I just lost somebody that I love, and I want to die right now.
We could have had the world. I think, even if for only a short period of time, we did.
At least, I did. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 29th, 2006|10:46 pm] |
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I really wish I knew what the hell is going on with my girlfriend. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 23rd, 2006|01:02 am] |
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Heh, what a weekend. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 19th, 2006|11:01 pm] |
fucking fuck fuckers i fucking hate them
but i love her
why do they have to do this shit :( |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 16th, 2006|01:52 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | lonely | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | Deftones | ] |
I feel like there's something I missed. There's something that I should be doing, or should have done. I can't quite figure it out, though. It feels like my life is slowly wasting away, and I'm not doing anything right. I suppose sitting around in my room, being anti-social is not helping. Perhaps I just need to see my girlfriend. It's been nearly a month since I last been with her, and it's hurting. Hurting a lot.
I can hold out another week. I've made it this far.
...unless I get hit by a bus. |
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| You're a drug, like the gun inside my mouth. |
[Jan. 9th, 2006|09:50 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | Action Action | ] |
So, I haven't updated LJ in a little while. Just sort of writing something here to let those of you who care know that I'm still alive.
I haven't seen my girlfriend in, going on 3 weeks now, and it really hurts. As a matter of fact, I haven't even talked to her all weekend. It's all worth it, though. She makes me feel like a fucking god, and is definately something worth fighting for. I'll be there forever, though. I wish I could show her that.
Anyways. Yeah, I'm alive. Still ticking.
..ticking
...ticking
....ticking
.....and boom.
The sleeping pills are mixing nicely with red wine. |
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| Happy New Year |
[Jan. 1st, 2006|04:49 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  optimistic | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | nothing | ] |
With a new year, brings a new beginning.
Reflecting on the past year, has made me realize a multitude of things. foremost, this year has been a really important one for me. I've changed a lot, learned a lot, and will never forget a lot of things that have come this year. I've realized who my true friends are, and met the love of my fucking life.
Thank you, '05. I'll never forget you.
Now, let's see what next year has in stock for us, shall we? |
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| Attention. |
[Dec. 26th, 2005|04:56 am] |
I've decided that my LJ will no longer be "friends only" for a multitude of reasons. More notable, I know that the lot of you who actually stumble upon my LJ page don't really care about my life, so what's the point in hiding it? Everybody has problems, it's just good to actually write about them. Maybe having those problems out there for those who actually care to read, will help me get some good advice. I've recently had a person very close to me hear a bit of advice they really needed to hear in a similar fashion.
so, yeah, that's that.
Judge away, internet. Judge away. I honestly don't care. |
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| Just say how to make it right. I swear I'll do my best to comply. |
[Dec. 26th, 2005|03:27 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | Iron and Wine | ] |
I wish love came with an instruction manual, cause I've never been so confused in my entire life.
On a side note, the 23rd marks my second month with the girl I love.
Also, merry late christmas, everybody. |
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| and in this moment, our hearts will stop... |
[Dec. 19th, 2005|05:28 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | My December | ] |
Looking down to the ground below, I've never wanted to jump so bad. I wonder what it's like to be free.
Have you ever felt like nothing matters?
The world exists for one thing, and one thing only. That thing is love. When love goes wrong, what else is there?
Sometimes, I don't see the point. But, then I'm reminded of why I haven't yet taken that dive to freedom. |
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| <3 |
[Dec. 13th, 2005|10:11 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | pleased | ] |
| [ | tunes |
| | Danse.... Macabre! | ] |
Scratch that.
WE'RE IN FUCKING LOVE! |
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thexvoid's journal